Exclusive: The Assorted Press Interview With “Shandy” the Libertarian

By The ASSORTED PRESS (TAP)

October 23, 2004 (TAP) -- Shortly after posting a message at her favorite “nonpartisan” forum Shandra Leer the well-known Internet writer took time to speak to our political editor, Blitz Wolfer. “Please call me ‘Shandy’”, Ms Leer told our editor.

Below is a partial transcript of that interview.

Shandy, as she would like to be called, was questioned and spoke on a wide range of subjects from her Hollywood experiences, her busy political writing career and to her many dislikes and “enemies”.

TAP: You recently had a falling out with your old Internet friend, Blitz; what happened?

SHANDY: Old friend Blitz? Who is Blitz? I don’t want to know Blitz since he joined the ranks of the neocons and became a Bush supporter.

TAP: How about your old former friend, Alvin Caruthers over at VRWC?

SHANDY: I don’t have anything to do now with my former celebrity friend Alvin since he pressed the mute button on his remote. Alvin and Blitz are now conspiring against me at that Christian site, the VRWC.

TAP: I understand that you had a personal relationship with Ronald and Nancy Reagan when you were still in California.

SHANDY: Yes, Ronald and Nancy were among my many famous Hollywood friends when I worked there. I helped Nancy and Ronald Reagan starting in 1963 and stayed with them all the way until they made it to the White House. 

TAP: Some male Internet posters find that your somewhat abrasive attitude toward men in general is off-putting. Do you really hate men?

SHANDY: Of course I don’t hate men, or at least I wouldn’t if they kept their dicks in their pants. I've learned that Christian men don't live too long and once out of the way, the women can return to constructive and intelligent lives again. 

TAP: I understand that you have strong views on abortion on demand for all women.

SHANDY: Yes, I do, to all those adulterous Christian men who can’t keep their dicks in their pants I say, “go build an orphanage before you try your pro-life shit on me”. 

TAP: The Assorted Press has learned that you left the Republican Party; does that mean you will not be voting for President Bush?

SHANDY:  Hell no, fucking President Bush’s morals don’t come up to my standards and he hasn't the courage or balls to be president; he is scared to death of losing the election in November.

TAP: It has been reported that you don’t care much for religion or to be more specific Christianity, is that true?

SHANDY: The Christian religious right is going to have to return to minding the business of their individual lives and get the hell out of the federal government.  We need a leader who will lead us by the Constitution not the bible. We need a leader who will not lie to the people and somehow justify it by a bible passage. 

TAP: Are you active in other political matters, Republican or Democratic?

SHANDY: To hell with both parties, as far as I'm concerned the GOP is dead.  They started playing dirty with Bush 41 and haven't made any effort to get back to the agenda that I demanded.

I get hundreds of emails every day from important people agreeing with my positions and me. It was me who brought in Perot and kept Bush 41 from being reelected, I actually made it work. There are thousands of Christian Republicans who still blame me for Clinton.

TAP: You have been accused of being too wordy, of responding with 10,000 word posts when a simple yes or no would have sufficed, what do you say to this?

SHANDY:  (Editorial note, Shandy’s answer to this question was too lengthy to include in this article.)

TAP: Some Internet posters have said you are self-centered, egotistical, paranoid, cranky, difficult, abrasive, that you engage in the practice of talking about yourself too much and that you have an exaggerated sense of self-importance – any truth in this?

SHANDY: That’s’ bullshit. These are just ugly rumors being spread by Christian men in order to discredit me in the eyes of my many, many important friends in Hollywood, inside the Washington beltway and in the “Nonpartisan” political forum that I participate in.

TAP: How about the accusation that you have often left political forums in an angry state and insisted you would never return only to come back a few months later – and have you now found a forum acceptable to your standards?

SHANDY: As an important writer and mover in politics I have made some enemies among Christian men. These evil Christians have followed and hounded me from forum to forum, what else could I do? Yes, I have found a good forum acceptable to me, they seem to like my style of Bush-bashing and that in turn endears me to Mr. O. Contraire the forum owner and former army commando.

TAP: One final question; is it true that several years ago you once posted at the Right Minds forum pretending to be a man and calling yourself “Uncle Fud " and the forum owner then called you out on it?

SHANDY: I don’t want to answer any more questions.

TAP: Thank you Ms Shandra Leer, we enjoyed it and we hope to talk to you again, we have more questions for you.

SHANDY: Okay Blitz, if I don't like the way this turns out my relative's lawyer friend is going to sue your ass.

CopiedRite, 2004 by the Assorted Press, Fritz and Blitz Wolfer Inc.

This Roman a Clef is a work of almost fiction. Names, characters, various fora and incidents are either the product of the Assorted Press editor’s imagination or are used facetiously and any resemblance to actual persons is probably a product of your own vivid imagination anyway.

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