May 24, 2004 (TAP) -- Michael Moore, the maker of films based on his view of the world, waits behind bars tonight after the Federal government jailed him on charges of sedition. The arrest came after Mr. Moore gave an interview in Indiana in which he criticized the Bush administration and accused the Bush family of conspiring with Osama Bin Laden to start World War III.

All evidence of Moore's interview with the Patriotic Progressive Internet Forum has been erased and the Forum's web site shut down.

As he was dragged off to prison, Moore screamed, “They applauded as Hitler closed down the independent newspaper and radio stations and only gave them his propaganda. When they did not rise up and say, ‘Give us a free press,’ they became just as guilty.”

On orders from the White House, none of the major networks covered the Moore story, nor did any of the national newspapers or........Wait.........what the hell is going on?

What are you doing in the Assorted Pres newsroom with those guns? Give me that keyboard back...hey!...lemme go...aaargh!....

IN THE TIME IT TOOK YOU TO READ THIS STORY, WE HAVE TRACED YOUR IP ADDRESS. WE HAVE UNITS ON THE WAY TO YOUR HOME OR OFFICE. RESISTANCE IS FUTILE. -- Thank You, Your Conservative Friends in the Vast Right Wing Conspiracy.

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Wake up Michael!........................you're dreaming.